UK government to hand over Santa’s Christmas present delivery services to G4S

Is it true that G4S are diversifying into the hospitality trade with the idea of hosting convivialities at the source of manufacture?
That has to be a winner – even they couldn’t mess that up – surely?

Pride's Purge

(satire?)

Despite controversies over the Olympics and two separate ongoing Serious Fraud Office investigations, the coalition government has announced security company G4S is to take over all UK Christmas present delivery services from Santa.

The scandal-ridden group, which admitted its failure to provide enough staff for the London Olympics was a “humiliating shambles” and is now embroiled in Serious Fraud Office probes into both its contract for tagging criminals and its welfare-to-work contract, is to take over the Christmas Day delivery contract which has historically been provided by Finnish company Santa Claus.

G4S is expected to bring new technology to the delivery of Christmas presents across the UK, with a fleet of 20 specially-adapted brand new Peugeot Boxer vans with GPS replacing the more traditional magic flying reindeers and a team of 150 highly-trained unemployed workfare ‘volunteers’ ready to climb down chimneys and hand-deliver presents to every child in every…

View original post 337 more words

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Author: gogwit

One foot in Sanity, the other in the adjoining parish, usually in the vicinity of the boundary between the two but sometimes straying into the main square of either and very occasionally taking occupation of the Town Hall...

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